[ch. 3] post-execution, w/ varian

[asswipe]

[...

There is no meta text distraught enough to describe how Veronica feels, so. Yeah.

Anyway, wherever he is — Varian is getting a hug after that mess. No words. Just... hugs now.]

Comments

[alchemenace]

[ Varian doesn't say anything or react to the hug much, just kind of... letting it happen.

he is shaking in her hold a little bit, though. ]

[asswipe]

[That's fine. She feels like she's going to barf, but this is fine!!

Either way, she pulls away just enough that she can look at him in the eyes.]

Varian, I am so sorry.

[alchemenace]

[ well good luck with that because he is definitely trying to avoid eye contact ]

...Yeah.

[ he doesn't got no words ]

[asswipe]

[save this child.]

... We don't have to talk about it now. But... I'm here for you, okay?

[alchemenace]

... Thanks, V. [ he wipes at his face. he's not crying, still, but. habit. ] I. I don't know what I'm feeling.

[asswipe]

... I'd be surprised if you knew what you were feeling right off the bat. [Emotions are messy and trauma is #bad.] Today has... It's been a lot. So take your time.

[alchemenace]

[ and he is trying to sparse those emotions, but. but he's an emotionally unstable fourteen year old so it's kind of really hard. he just stares at his hands for a second before admitting: ]

... I miss my dad.

[ it's what it boils down to, right now. he's upset and scared and he's been that way for so, so long now. he just. he just wants his dad to be there and okay again. ]

[asswipe]

[... Oh, jeez. She pulls him a little closer at that, sucking in a breath because — well. She witnessed him snapping at Natsuo last night. "No one else is going to save my dad" is a little... hm. Bad.]

Look, Varian... [hM.] I don't know what's going on with your dad, but... Once we figure this whole mess out, we... we can figure that out, too. I promise.

[alchemenace]

[ he takes a deep, shaky breath before he pushes veronica away. gently. ]

No, we won't. I've tried everything. [ his voice breaks on that ] And every time, every-- every single time, I was wrong. I shouldn't have been wrong, the science was there, but it--

[ anyway. ]

Nothing worked.

[asswipe]

You've tried everything from your world.

[It's fine. She's not offended or anything, but. Jesus, Varian.]

We're in an entirely different land right now, surrounded by magic. We have all kinds of people from all kinds of worlds here, too. Maybe... Maybe nothing worked before, but someone or something here could help you and your dad.

[alchemenace]

[ he looks away with a sigh ]

There's magic in Corona. [ which is half his problem, but. ] I don't... have a good track record getting help with. With that.

[ everyone turned their backs on me! it had to be this way.

it's weird. thinking of conversations with rapunzel. he still feels that anger, but she's ... anyway. ]

[asswipe]

But the magic that exists in your world isn't the same that exists in other worlds. I... I know I don't understand a lot about this, but there could be more options for you to go through now. And even you think no one will help you, I want to.

[She doesn't understand any of this, like. At all. But it's the optimistic point of view?? Or something. Jesus, take the wheel.]

[alchemenace]

[ it's not the first time he cries today (it. really isn't), but it is the first time since he stopped after steph. somehow, just that-- just that statement snaps something inside of varian and he hides his face in his hands as he tries to stifle his sobs.

give him. give him a second. ]

[asswipe]

[He can take all the seconds he needs, tbh. She'll just be here, chilling, internally dying, giving him space.]

[alchemenace]

[ anyway after a bit he's just shaking his head and. just. yeah. ]

I can't... I couldn't... I'm. [ he takes in a deep breath, hiccuping ] I don't, I don't know why I'm-- [ crying. well, no. he knows a little. ] No one ever...

[ varian @ himself: stop fucking crying. in the end he's just looking down and swallowing, whispering: ]

Please don't say it if you don't mean it. Please.

[ he can't... take that. not again. ]

[asswipe]

I mean it. [FIRMLY.

One day, Veronica will stop making blood pacts with people who have their own villain song... But that day is not today!!]

I'm with you through thick and thin. I already told you, you're my friend.

[alchemenace]

...

[ ... ]

Okay. O-okay. I. I believe you. [ ...... ] .... Thank you.