asswipe | [ch. 5] wednesday, w/ nico

[Sup Veronica. Nico was in fact entering the kitchen and though he doesn't need the counters he can't help but notice what she's doing. Also obviously something entirely black catches his attention.]

Uh. Veronica? [Hey, hi, hello.] What is that?

[Unfortunately for both of them, she's so caught up in retrieving her item that she doesn't notice him until it's too late. This leads to her slamming her head against one of the cabinets, immediately pulling back to rub at her forehead before just. You know. Turning towards him and trying to be ~casual~.]

H— Heyyyyyy, Nico. [Nothing to see here. Please don't comment on her shame.] Just, um, something from the lost and found. How's it going?

[Ah.] I'm not the one who just slammed my head into a cabinet so I think I'm alright. [He raises an eyebrow though.] Do you...need a hand or...?

[Giving him a look like, NICO. WHY. Before she sighs, nodding.]

Do you see anything I can use to drag it down? My arm isn't, um, long enough.

[Short people woes.]

[They're close in height unfortunately, but he pauses to think.]

Do you want to borrow my sword?

[... a beat.]

Um, did you not see how I held that katana last trial?

I did, which was hilarious, but you're not swinging it. You're using it to latch onto whatever's up there. Think you could do that?

Maybe. Or— Or maybe I'll accidentally stab myself instead? I guess I might as well upstage whoever killed Hijikata. [Hah hah.] ... Ignore that. That was terrible.

[Veronica,,,]

But it's worth a try, anyway.

[Terrible as that is, there's a slight crack of a grin. Sometimes morbidity can be funny.]

You won't stab yourself and if you do I have bandages in my pocket. [With that he hands her the hilt of his sword. It's probably fine and not at all dangerous despite being super sharp.] And if you're that worried, I could probably grab it.

... You should have offered to grab it before you handed me your sword, don't you think?

[It's. Not said like an insult, at least? Either way, this was a bad idea and she wobbles a bit as she tries to pull the thing down using his sword. It takes her a second, but she does succeed in dragging it down.

... And almost immediately overestimates how hard she needs to pull to get it down. The item goes flying halfway across the kitchen, revealing it to be the most pretentious hot topic coat. Hi. Hello.

Maybe Nico should take his sword back before Veronica stabs herself, though.]

[A shrug.] Most of the people I know just kind of handles things on their own. [Likewise, it's not an insult but demigods are self-sufficient. Still, the coat goes flying and Nico watches it go before giving Veronica a Look.]

...all of that for a jacket? [He's taking his sword, give him that!!]

... Yeah. Okay. That's fair.

[He can take the sword!! She doesn't want it!!!!

And she's giving him a withering look as she hops down from the counter to head over to where the coat fell.]

Hey. Is your objective making people feel judged? Because I'm feeling pretty judged right now.

Please. I don't need an objective for that. [There's a grin though? Sorry, Veronica, it's funny. He's sliding his sword back into the scabbard.]

But seriously, Veronica. Is it important?

[nico why are you this way!!

She rolls her eyes at him, huffing.]

Of course it is. I wouldn't have gone out of my way to get it down if it wasn't.

[She's not a big fan of exercising unnecessarily. :// Either way, she reaches for the coat, her fingertips making contact with it—

And then the two of them will find themselves trapped in a bubble. Fun!]

[Given this keeps happening, the bubble comes up and he groans.]

Not this again! [But he doesn't try to make a break for it. Instead, he's waiting for impact and bracing himself for whatever he's about to see from Veronica's point of view.]

Wait— What?!

[What, indeed.

Unfortunately for both of them, there isn't much time to react before a memory begins. Nico will find himself transported to a memorial service, where two fathers are openly grieving the death of their sons.

... I, Kyuu, have no idea how this would translate to dialogue — but have fun watching the two dads make out in front of their sons('s corpses)?? It's fine. This is fine. I blame Eli for being an enabler.]

[I hate you and Eli both fwiw. Nico on the other hand is just...going to stare and this is Super Unfortunate.]

What...is even happening here? [WHAT IS THIS?] This seems highly inappropriate for a funeral.

[This is Super Unfortunate and for a lot of reasons that Nico doesn't even know. Bubbles were a mistake.]

I... The power of love? Acceptance? [She's. Cringing as she says that. Sorry for dad smooches.] I don't know either. It was— It was a lot?

[This is so much.]

If that's what love and acceptance looks like I'll pass, I think. Seems a little traumatic.

[Granted the bubble wavers a bit and begins to grow...dark? So that's unfortunate.] Did this kind of thing happen often or...?

No. Or... God, I hope not.

[ONCE WAS WEIRD ENOUGH!! The bubble growing dark is Unfortunate, though, and she blinks.]

... Uh?

Um. [The bubble's dark and he's suddenly equally alarmed as the scene shifts, ready to be on guard and fight if he has to.

A palace garden comes into view, skeletal white trees growing from marble basins. Flower beds overflow with golden plants and gemstones. A pair of thrones, one bone and one silver, sit on the balcony with a view of an abysmal wheat field, the echoing cry of tortured souls in the distance. Skeletal warriors guard the only exit while wearing tattered U.S. Army desert combat fatigues and carrying M16s.

A Fury drops a 15 year old boy on the ground, angry with dark hair and sea green eyes. A second Fury drops a younger Nico next to him and the two swoop with a third to settle on the top of the skeletal throne.

It's silent before the air shimmers. Three figures appear—a very tall, imposing and very muscular man with albino white skin, black glittering eyes and shoulder-length black hair, with bangs usually covering most of his forehead dressed in black flowing robes, a young woman with black hair and brown eyes and a dress made of flower patterns in the fabric changed and bloomed—roses, tulips, honeysuckle, and an older woman who would be her mother given they look very alike, her dress the color of a wheat field and her hair was woven with dried grasses. The trio are arguing as they appear, the man and younger woman on their thrones and the older woman between them.

"—told you he was a bum!" the older woman says.

"Mother!"

"We have visitors!" the man shouts. "Please!" He smooths his black robes, covered with the terrified faces of the damned. "Percy Jackson," he says then. "At last."

The queen studies the older boy curiously.

"Hmmph," the older woman says. "Demigods. Just what we need."

Nico doesn't reply, but he kneels before the thrones. "Father,", he says. "I have done as you asked."

"Took you long enough," the man grumbles. "Your sister would've done a better job."

Nico lowers his head but doesn't speak. Instead, Percy speaks. "What do you want, Hades?"

"To talk, of course." The god twists his mouth in a cruel smile. "Didn't Nico tell you?"

"So this whole quest was a lie. Nico brought me down here to get me killed."

"Oh, no," Hades says. "I'm afraid Nico was quite sincere about wanting to help you. The boy is as honest as he is dense. I simply convinced him to take a small detour and bring you here first."

"Father," Nico interrupts, "you promised that Percy would not be harmed. You said if I brought him, you would tell me about my past—about my mother."

The queen sighs dramatically. "Can we please not talk about that woman in my presence?"

"I'm sorry, my dove," Hades replies. "I had to promise the boy something."

The older lady makes a disgruntled noise. "I warned you, daughter. This scoundrel Hades is no good. You could've married the god of doctors or the god of lawyers, but noooo. You had to eat the pomegranate."

"Mother—"

"And get stuck in the Underworld!"

"Mother, please—"

"And here it is August, and do you come home like you're supposed to? Do you ever think about your poor lonely mother?"

"DEMETER!" Hades shouts. "That is enough. You are a guest in my house."

"Oh, a house is it?" Demeter says. "You call this dump a house? Make my daughter live in this dark, damp—"

"I told you," Hades says, grinding his teeth, "there's a war in the world above. You and Persephone are better off here with me."

"Excuse me," Percy finally chimes in again. "But if you're going to kill me, could you just get on with it?"

All three gods look at him in surprise.

"Well, this one has an attitude," Demeter says.

"Indeed," Hades agrees. "I'd love to kill him."

"Father!" Nico reacts. "You promised!"

"Husband, we talked about this," Persephone agrees. "You can't go around incinerating every hero. Besides, he's brave. I like that."

Hades rolls his eyes. "You liked that Orpheus fellow too. Look how well that turned out. Let me kill him, just a little bit."

"Father, you promised!" Nico says again. "You said you only wanted to talk to him. You said if I brought him, you'd explain."

Hades glowers, smoothing the folds of his robes. "And so I shall. Your mother—what can I tell you? She was a wonderful woman." He glances uncomfortably at Persephone. "Forgive me, my dear. I mean for a mortal, of course. Her name was Maria di Angelo. She was from Venice, but her father was a diplomat in Washington, D.C. That's where I met her. When you and your sister were young, it was a bad time to be children of Hades. World War II was brewing. A few of my, ah, other children were leading the losing side. I thought it best to put you two out of harm's way."

"That's why you hid us in the Lotus Casino?"

Hades shrugs. "You didn't age. You didn't realize time was passing. I waited for the right time to bring you out."

"But what happened to our mother? Why don't I remember her?"

"Not important," Hades snaps.

"What? Of course it's important. And you had other children—why were we the only ones who were sent away? And who was the lawyer who got us out?"

Hades grits his teeth. "You would do well to listen more and talk less, boy. As for the lawyer . . ." Hades snaps his fingers. On top of his throne, one of the Furies begins to change until she's a middle-aged man in a pinstriped suit with a briefcase, crouched over Hades' shoulder.

"You!" Nico shouts.

The Fury cackles. "I do lawyers and teachers very well!"

Percy watches as Nico trembles, focused on keeping the conversation. "But why did you free us from the casino?"

"You know why," Hades said. "This idiot son of Poseidon cannot be allowed to be the child of the prophecy."

Percy plucks a ruby off the nearest plant and throws it at Hades. It disappears harmlessly into his robe. "You should be helping Olympus!" he says. "All the other gods are fighting Typhon, and you're just sitting here—"

"Waiting things out," Hades finishes. "Yes, that's correct. When's the last time Olympus ever helped me, half-blood? When's the last time a child of mine was ever welcomed as a hero Bah! Why should I rush out and help them? I'll stay here with my forces intact."

"And when Kronos comes after you?"

"Let him try. He'll be weakened. And my son here, Nico—" Hades looks at Nico with distaste. "Well, he's not much now, I'll grant you. It would've been better if Bianca had lived. But give him four more years of training. We can hold out that long, surely. Nico will turn sixteen, as the prophecy says, and then he will make the decision that will save the world. And I will be king of the gods."

"You're crazy," Percy replies. "Kronos will crush you, right after he finishes pulverizing Olympus."

Hades spreads his hands. "Well, you'll get a chance to find out, half-blood. Because you'll be waiting out this war in my dungeons."

"No!" Nico interjects. "Father, that wasn't our agreement. And you haven't told me everything!"

"I've told you all you need to know," Hades argues. "As for our agreement, I spoke with Jackson. I did not harm him. You got your information. If you had wanted a better deal, you should've made me swear on the Styx. Now, go to your room!" He waves his hand, and Nico vanishes into thin air, just as the bubble itself goes dark and the real Nico di Angelo glares holes into the side of it.]

[...

Why are literally all the PJOs cursed. Magnus? Dead. Reyna? Intimidating. Nico? Family issues????]

... Uh. [That was. So much.] Do you want me to kick the god of the underworld in the nuts for you?

[There's a thin, uncertain smile.]

I don't imagine that would go over well. My father can be a little sensitive. [But also. Fuck Hades.]

[ch. 5] wednesday, w/ nico

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